One more day and I’m about to embark a new chapter again. I don't know why but for some reasons, this same day always makes me feel nostalgic. I know I should be happy and excited on my special day but I am not. Is it just me who feels this way?
Maybe because I don’t want to get old :) (naahh) while unaccomplished from the dreams and plans that I've set for myself.
I remember two years ago, I felt so down and empty that I literally cried secretly on my birthday. Well that’s another story.
But yesterday, I was chatting with my 11 year old son about love and life in general. I was in awe most of the time to know that we could talk at that certain level. How could he be so sensible? Aww, I’m just a lucky mom.
Anyways, our conversation brought back all the memories I’ve once forgotten. Those were fun, silly, embarrassing and even heartbreaking. But I still managed to laugh though. And it was all a good laugh.
Then I remember my younger self being so self driven, spontaneous with her decisions yet a risk taker when it came to love. As a result of my impulsiveness, many times I've failed - both personally and professionally but somehow I've always managed to bounce back, move on and stay positive :)
Note to self:
My life isn't perfect and can never be.Things may not turn out the way I expected them to be but looking back from where I am right now, I realized this is exactly what my heart desired a long long time ago - to have a loving family that I can call my own.
That being said, I am so GRATEFUL to HIM and that’s enough reason for me to smile now. :)
Hugs,
Joan

Hi there,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing a part of your wonderful old self through this blog. I can exactly relate in the feelings and emotions, and I can say that it was beautiful and colourful. My life is also not perfect and I made so many wrong decisions in the past but I don't regret it. I still smile when I remembers my very first special someone whom I love most and made me complete. It was extremely sad that we don't have formal closure....Anyways, keep on blogging and I wish all the best to you and your family.
hugs and kisses
Hello! Thanks for leaving some thoughtful words here. You're my first commenter for this year so I really appreciate that :) It feels good to know that someone can relate to my feelings :)
DeleteAll the best to you and your family as well!
xoxo,
Joan